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Men Made For More Podcast Episode 146: Keeping Promises to Yourself

leadership mindset Apr 27, 2021

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So many people are really good at keeping promises to other people - but terrible at keeping promises to themselves. Over time, this will wreck your confidence, your potential, and your belief in yourself and what’s possible with your life. Listen up today to learn why it’s so important to keep your promises to yourself and how to start building your trust back up on your way to doing bigger and better things.

Master Your Morning, Master Your Day. Download our Master Your Morning Routine at to learn the 7 Power Strategies to take charge of your day from the moment you wake up to bring more focus, energy, clarity, and confidence to your day.

I love hearing from you guys and what you’re learning from the show. Shoot me a DM on Instagram at @DrDavePac or text me at (760) 477-4361 and let me know your biggest takeaway from today’s listen.

Men Made For More Podcast Episode 146: Keeping Promises to Yourself

[00:00:00] Dave: [00:00:00] Hey there mighty man. I'm your host, Dr. Dave Paczkowski founder of Men Made for more coaching, our business helps husbands level up their life. Their leadership and their legacy in marriage and in business. The purpose of this podcast is to bring together like-minded men that feel destined for big things in their life to provide you the resources and community that you need to lead yourself, your family and your business.

[00:00:27] If you've ever felt overwhelmed, frustrated, lost, or alone on your journey to a better and more purposeful life, you're in the right spot. You weren't designed to be average. So it's time to quit living that way today. I'm giving you permission to unlock your true potential and step into all that you were made for.

[00:00:45]What's up guys. Welcome to today's episode of the men made for more podcast, stoked to have you with me here today. I love being able to just pour out this information, pour out this knowledge, my experience with you [00:01:00] guys and appreciate you guys invest in, in yourselves, your growth and your progress. And we are always on journey.

[00:01:07] We are always improving. Uh, there's so many areas of our lives that we, we need to continue to refine and, and, uh, help. Uh, sometimes that's our fitness. Sometimes it's our work. Sometimes our relationships, sometimes it's our spiritual life or mindset. And, uh, It's just so important to be, uh, not just consuming this information, but applying it, you guys know I'm big on applying things and that's exactly what we're going to continue to push here on the podcast because it's, it's one thing to listen, but make sure you guys are taking information and applying it.

[00:01:40] That's where the magic happens today. We are talking about promises and specifically keeping promises to yourself. So many people out there really good at keeping promises to other people. Terrible at keeping promises to themselves. And over time, this will wreck your confidence, your potential, [00:02:00] and your belief in yourself, and what's possible in your life.

[00:02:02] And what's really possible, not just what you think is possible, but those big things that are possible for you guys. So listen enough today to learn why it's not only important to keep promises to yourself, but how do you start building your trust back up on your way to doing these bigger and better things?

[00:02:19]I know, I know it's kind of goes without saying, but you guys wouldn't break promises. At least you shouldn't break promises to other people. So why do you continue to break them with yourself? The consequences of continuing to break promises for yourself are low confidence, procrastination, lack of belief, bitterness in yourself, or in others, guilt or lack of results.

[00:02:44] And if this sounds familiar, if any of these sound familiar, You might be, you might be, uh, you know, caught in not keeping the promises that you set out to do. How does this happen? What does this look like? This could be something as simple as I'm going to work out today. Work [00:03:00] runs late. Uh, we get, we get busy.

[00:03:02] We don't end up working out that day. This could be, I'm going to make, I'm going to make a 10 new contacts in my business. I'm gonna reach out to 10 new potential clients, potential customers, and something else ends up coming up. And you don't have doing that. This could be something you're going to do for your wife or your kids or friend or family member.

[00:03:23] But. Life gets in the way and you put it off for tomorrow. I'll take care of that tomorrow. All of these little things are all these little micro commitments that we don't follow through on is affecting the trust we have with ourself. So what's going to happen. If we continue to do these things, day in, day out, we say we're going to do something.

[00:03:44] We don't do it. Imagine what that would happen in, in your relationship with, uh, with a spouse, with a family member. If you always said you were going to show up at a certain time and then you didn't do it, imagine the effect that's going to have on your relationship. Well, the same thing's happening in [00:04:00] your relationship with, with yourself and your confidence and your belief.

[00:04:03] If you continue to do that, then what happens when you have this new dream, this new idea, this new business you want to start this new workout routine you want to do, and you get all excited about it. But then what is your subconscious start to say? Well, you're not really good at sticking to things. So what makes this any different?

[00:04:21] And that's going to keep you playing small. It's going to keep you inside your comfort zone. That's going to either keep you from jumping, uh, you know, jumping into that and take an action on it, or it's going to just affect how you're, how you're showing up with it. And I have a, I have a client who started coaching recently.

[00:04:41] Who's to have a real hard time keeping promises with themself. It's always a yes, man, always looking out for others, but never for himself picks up shifts for others. He's, uh, you know, picking up Slack where others are falling short, but continuing to compromise his own goals. And this led to [00:05:00] poor results.

[00:05:00] Poor self-esteem both in personal life and in his business. And there's been a huge transformation though. Once we, once we identified this and we were able to get some, some strategies in place for, Hey, we should need to start keeping promises to yourself. There's been a huge shift mentally, physically, and his ability to follow through on those promises that he sets for himself.

[00:05:24] And now, instead of putting all these things off, he is meditating daily and what that's leading to more peace, more calm. It's consistently exercising, which leads to more energy, better health he's following through on the activities he know will pushes forward, push his business forward. Things like, and this will result in things like more revenue potential to grow potential, to build something better than himself.

[00:05:47] And. He's choosing to pass on things like late night TV and alcohol, which leads to better sleep, which then leads to more focus and productivity in the next day. So, guys, these are little things that are probably happening [00:06:00] to a small degree in, and this is the key point, not in all areas, but in an area where you're not seeing the progress.

[00:06:06] You want pay attention to what you're saying you're going to do and what you're actually following through on. So how do we. How do we start to unpack this and how do we get some, some practical things that we can do to start making sure that we are keeping promises to ourselves? First thing in our overarching thing with all of this start small, don't go, don't go bite off something, buy something off more than you can, or than you can chew.

[00:06:31] Sure. You start really small. That's the biggest thing with these promises. If, if you can't, uh, if you find yourself not able to get to the gym or not able to sit down and do the work you need to, don't continue to set the same, the same thing. That's not working. Start something even smaller. All you need to do is pick up the momentum.

[00:06:51] If you don't want to start saying, I'm going to go back to the gym and workout for an hour, you might say, Hey, I'm just going to show up at the gym. I'll get on the treadmill walk for five minutes. I'll [00:07:00] do a, I'll do a little bit of stretching and strength work, like start something so small that, you know, you can do, it might be something even smaller.

[00:07:07] Like I'm going to do 10 pushups a day. I'm going to do five pushups in the morning, five pushups in the evening. These are the types of small promises that can start to build incredible momentum. So make sure you, uh, in terms of how to, you know, get even more tactical with this, once you identify what that is at the start of each day, write down one promise.

[00:07:27] One promise you will commit to keeping with yourself, write it down. Yes. On paper. Ideally. Ideally not on your phone, actually physically write it out, stick it somewhere where you're going to remember it and then commit to keeping that with yourself. It's just as important as if you told someone else you're going to do that.

[00:07:44] So write that down at the beginning of the day, and then second steps equally simple, but equally effective at the end of the day, just review and reflect. Did you do it? Yes or no. You're going to have to answer that to yourself. And if you review this every day, you're going to get sick of, uh, telling yourself that you didn't show [00:08:00] up again.

[00:08:00] So did you do it yes or no? Second thing. Can you bite off something more ambitious or do you need to throttle back? Maybe you find out like, Hey, I've been doing this for week seven for seven. I can take on a little more. Or if you're over seven, you say, Hey, something's not working. I need to start even smaller.

[00:08:19] I need to throw this back even more. I couldn't do 10 pushups. Can I do one set of pushups? When I wake up, these are the types of things you need to start doing, because it's not about, it's not about what you're doing in that activity. And this is the biggest thing it's not about. Oh, I only did five pushups when I know I need 50 pushups to, uh, to see some, some real results.

[00:08:40] That's not what this is about. This is about building your confidence back and saying, Hey, when I say I'm going to do something, I actually do it. I show up for myself. I invest in myself. I do that. So that's the important thing to remember with this guys. It's not about what you're actually doing. It's just about.

[00:08:56] Never missing, get in the habit of doing what you say you're going to do [00:09:00] every single day, and that is going to go such a long way in your success. So that's, uh, that's some of the real tactical things. Another, another thing to start to pay attention to. And I heard this a while back, uh, uh, my wife and I were listening to a podcast Chris and Heidi Pollard put out about it was called, uh, a power promise.

[00:09:18] And this was, uh, a new idea for, for me. And there's another thing you guys can consider in your life of this is essentially, uh, a promise to yourself that is a Keystone habit that creates positive change in all areas of your life. So I encourage you guys to write down daily of what, uh, what your promises for the day that you're gonna keep with yourself, but also consider having, uh, identifying what a power promises for you.

[00:09:43] And this is some kind of, it could be a self-care activity. It could be something that you commit to doing. All the time essentially. So something you can commit to all the time, it doesn't have to be anything big, but it could be something like, uh, you know, trying to prioritize sleep X amount of hours a night.

[00:09:59] It [00:10:00] could be, you know, drinking eight glasses of water a day. It could be avoiding late night, snacking your alcohol. It could be just taking a daily walk. It doesn't matter how far it could be reading a book. Doesn't matter how many pages said the important thing with this, this power promises to identify what has the most carry over to other activities?

[00:10:19] So one, one, uh, you know, example, example in my life could be, you know, something like hydration plays a big role, something like a breathing exercise that I do in the morning when I do those, uh, when I do those breathing exercises. My energy is better throughout the day. I make better decisions. I don't fully know why, but, uh, I, I mean, I have, I have some ideas of, of why that, uh, why that likely is.

[00:10:42] But for some reason, when I commit to habits like that, when I commit to a daily walk of just getting outside, seeing some sunshine, taking a walk, no matter how far these things are, all power promises that I've stacked up over time, that lead to progress in other areas. When I take a daily walk, my stress is down.

[00:10:59] And when my stress is [00:11:00] down, I'm less likely to reach for something I shouldn't be eating or overeating or miss a workout, or do any of these things that, uh, you know, that can often happen. So identify what that is for you. What's something that if you committed to doing this, you'd see improvement in other areas.

[00:11:15] So it might be a physical thing. If I do this, then my relationships get a little better. My work gets a little better. My sleep gets better and. Then there's this snowball effect, this positive snowball effect of all those things. So that's the, uh, the couple takeaways I have for you guys. So the, again, the power promise, we just talked about, identify what that is and try and commit to it.

[00:11:37] Second thing, I just start small and write out a daily promise that you're going to keep to yourself. Every day, write it out at the end of the day, review it super simple, but super tactical. And if you guys are having trouble keeping promises to yourself, if you find that you're saying you're gonna do things and not doing them, you guys are probably underestimating [00:12:00] the power behind starting small and doing something as simple as writing it down every day.

[00:12:05] You could think, um, I'm above that. I, I can do so much more than that. I can, I can work out six days a week, even though I haven't been doing it. I can tell you guys, are you guys, you guys are setting yourselves up for, for some kind of failure. This seems overly simple, but man, I've implemented this in my life.

[00:12:24] I've done this with dozens of clients and they see incredible improvements. So don't, don't start too fast. Don't say, Hey, I'm going to skip steps one through six and just get out of step seven. No, start with step one, proved yourself that you can do it. Earn, earn your trust to yourself that way and build over time.

[00:12:43] Guys, I appreciate you listening. I appreciate you investing in yourself, investing in listening to this podcast. Uh, you know, I love to hear from you guys. Uh, my, uh, Instagram DMS in there at Dr. Dave pack, uh, my cells in the show notes as well, (760) [00:13:00] 477-4361. Shoot me a text. Let me know what you guys thought of the show, what feedback you have, what you want to see more of.

[00:13:06] And I love keeping the conversations going. I love, uh, being messaged back and forth. If you guys. Uh, in the weeks in between the launching of the podcast. So please continue to take me up on that. Uh, we've got a ton of free resources. I can send you if you guys have a certain area where, uh, your. Having trouble seeing the, seeing the progress you want one popular one right now that's in the show notes there you're the master your morning mindset, all about learning the power strategies that are going to set yourself up for success.

[00:13:35] Start your day with a bang physically, mentally, spiritually, and get you guys throttled up and ready to go for the day. So if you guys are interested in that, go check that out in the show notes. There hit me up with any, uh, any questions, any feedback. And, uh, just to keep the combo going and, uh, appreciate you guys go crush your day and we'll talk soon.

[00:13:53]Thanks for listening today, guys, unbelieving that even if you apply one thing from today's show, you're taking one step [00:14:00] closer to living as the man you were made to be meaningful change doesn't happen overnight. So keep showing up and keep consistent every single day until good things start to happen.

[00:14:09] If you haven't already taken 60 seconds to write a review on whatever platform you're listening on, goes a long way in growing this podcast and reaching other men, just like you, that are hungry for more in their life. Do you have any questions on today's show feedback or content you want to see more of shoot me a text.

[00:14:27] Yeah, text me (760) 477-4361 at (760) 477-4361. Let me know that you're listening to it. And so I can personally thank you for your support of myself and the show. That's it for today, guys, it's time to raise your standard for yourself. Stop settling for just getting by, go all in on your passions in the Lightroom made for a lot of you guys and talk to you soon.

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